Jeff's Stuff

We all know, or at least we should know, that our legal system isn't always fair. Our legal system also doesn't always make sense. Logic and the law are not the best of friends. Still, there are a couple of examples that baffle me. These are things that really confuse me, really piss me off, or both. Occasionally, I will post some of these here. This is just the first one.

If I were to have sex with a woman and she were to become pregnant unintentionally, the decision to have an abortion is hers, and hers alone. This seems pretty basic. It's her body. I wouldn't expect the courts to give me the right to have any sort of control over another person's body.

If she chooses to have an abortion, I have no standing to stop her. While I am pro-choice, I find it interesting that I contributed half the genetic material for a child, yet I have no say whether it lives or dies. The mother is in 100% control. Her body, her choice.

Up until this point, I believe that I understand the law fully. I also think, I agree with it. But then the trouble begins. Let's assume that the woman decides to carry the child to term. She has a baby. This is a child that I did not want. Yet somehow, the law says that I have to support this child. Even though, I had no choice in the matter beyond conception.

The mother had the option of an abortion. I did not. Likewise, I couldn't stop an abortion if I disagreed and wanted her to keep the child. So the mother has total control. Why then, must I support the child?

A woman could tell a man that she is "on the pill" or is using some other form of birth control. She could be lying. She could be intentionally deceiving the man in the hopes of becoming pregnant. Yet even though she has committed fraud, the father still has to support the child.

The thing that really bugs me about this situation is that sex is supposed to be between "consenting adults". What ever happened to informed consent? If the man is deceived, is the consent then no longer valid? I'm sure many people will say that, "well then you shouldn't have had sex in the first place. You knew the risks."

The trouble I have is that, in our society today, women expect equality. Arguably, they deserve it. So does equality mean that they get their way all the time? Does equality mean whatever is best for the woman? Of course not! But that's the way our laws have been crafted.

A woman can deceive a man, become pregnant, and then demand compensation. In effect, reward for her deception. Its an interesting progression: deceive -> conceive -> receive

The Other Side of the Coin

There is another side of this that is even more interesting. Let's say that you are married man. You've been faithful to your wife for 10 years now. You have three children. You discover, during a routine visit to your child's pediatrician, your child's blood type. You suddenly realize that it is not possible for this to be your biological child. A DNA test confirms that the chance of this child being yours biologically is about as remote as that of Rush Limbaugh being the keynote speaker at a Planned Parenthood convention.

You confront your wife and discover that she had an affair. You yell, you scream, you hire attorneys, and the next thing you know you are divorced. Then, and only then, do you discover that you have to pay child support for all of your children. That includes the one that isn't biologically yours!

I think this is relatively important and bears repeating. You are required to financially support all of the children conceived during the marriage. Even if you weren't the father! Your wife committed adultery, and you have to pay.

What's more, let's say that you walk in on your wife having sex with her lover. You leave her. Nine months later, it turns out that she got pregnant. She was pregnant before the divorce was final, thus... you pay!

Please don't get me wrong. I have great respect for women. Any man who has witnessed childbirth and doesn't think that women deserve much more credit than they get, simply isn't paying attention. The whole concept of "equal rights" is a joke. I can't have a baby. I'm sorry, but I don't feel equal. In many ways, men and women are equal. Still, one has to seriously consider giving them points for the ability to have a baby.

Still, having respect is one thing. Being willing to be taken advantage of, is quite another. Our laws should protect all of us equally. If the child isn't yours, you shouldn't have to pay for it.

Stay tuned... more laws that piss me off to come.