Jeff's Stuff

Well folks, as the title suggests, today I have some random silliness.

The Church Van
The other day, I was out with the family, when we came upon the van pictured below. Now, I have always suspected that religion was a dangerous thing. Still, I never thought that they would actually admit it. I certainly didn't think they would include a warning sign like this one.

I always suspected that religion was a dangerous thing. Now I guess I have proof.

Now, I realize that the warning was not meant as a caution against religion. Still, I fail to see what the warning is for. I mean, are church bus drivers as a group, more reckless than other drivers? Are church bus riders more likely to throw projectiles at the other cars? Are church vans somehow likely to spontaneously explode?

The answer to this is obviously "no", "no" and "I hope not". Still, I wonder about such things. Why the warning? Do the owners/occupants of the van feel that because they are in a church vehicle that they are somehow entitled to more consideration on the road? Do they feel that I should be a more careful driver because of who they are?

Well that seems just as silly as the first three ideas. It reminds me a lot of the obnoxious "baby on board" signs that used to grace every SUV and minivan on the road. It seems to me that, since the van is occupied by "believers", they should need less protection from me since they are clearly obtaining it through divine intervention. If God is looking out for them, I can spend more time looking out for the other cars. Now, if the car said something like, "Atheist on Board" I might cut the guy a little more slack. After all, nobody is looking out for him.

The 101.89% Solution

My son and I went into the woods the other day for a short hike. I strongly recommend this to other parents as it is much healthier than sitting around eating chips and playing video games (like way too many children today do). Anyway, after about 10 minutes, I realized that some insect repellent would've been a really good idea. Unfortunately, it was a really good idea that I didn't have until 10 minutes into the trip.

We now carry with us when we hike, insect repellent. And, as medical professionals advise, I made sure it contains lots of DEET. Now, I have no idea what DEET is. I'm sure, based on the sound of it alone, that 10 years from now they will determine that it is more harmful than DDT! Nonetheless, I bought the most potent DEET I could find.

Then I looked closely at the label...

I guess this is where they get the 110% solution from.

So if it's 100% DEET, where does the 1.89% of "other ingredients" come from? now, I know it's been a long time since I've had percentages in school. Still, I recall the fact that you can't really have more than 100% of something. Certainly, a solution can not contain more than 100% of a particular substance. 100% does imply to me, and most of the world, that there is nothing else in the bottle besides that substance in question.

This one is so puzzling to me that I won't even try to explain it here. Well, I can explain it. It's just not that funny. The answer is that the marketing folks, in an attempt to sell more insect repellent, put "100% DEET" on the label when in fact there isn't 100% DEET in the bottle. Then, they justified it by putting a tiny little asterisk on the label. I wonder, does all liability go away with an asterisk? I mean, are we going to start seeing foods with asterisks leading us to very very tiny print saying something like, "* may contain botulism, strychnine, arsenic, plutonium, and lead based paint"?

I'm surprised that food manufacturers... I say manufacturers because very little food is grown these days compared to what is "processed"... anyway, are food manufacturers going to start putting asterisks on food saying, "* may contain E. coli, salmonella, mad cow disease, and plague"? It seems like that would be the answer to all the liability the face from all the contaminated food we've been seeing lately. An asterisk is certainly easier and less expensive than say proper food handling!